Three weeks ago today I took BU3 Uhler to the airport. That means his job is a builder and he’s a 3rd class Petty Officer, incase you didn’t know that… (I wouldn’t if I wasn’t married to him)!
9/14/09 – I decided to email Derick last night instead of posting this blog. So here I am, writing it today. Allyn is playing in the kitchen and Aida is sitting in my room with me. I hope Allyn isn’t making too much of a mess for me to clean up. He seems to be pretty good at that. I have such a hard time keeping my house picked up (not cleaned… just picked up) because I feel like I spend the whole day putting out fires and cleaning up messes! This morning he went in the kitchen after breakfast and started playing with his untouched cereal bowl. What A Mess!!
Yesterday was a good day. Brody is starting to sleep longer, which is great! But, its messing up the schedule I had him on. I’m trying really hard to arrange his nursing schedule so that he will eat during Sunday School on Sundays, so that I can sit in church by myself during the service. But today he slept til 6:30. That’s not late enough to skip a feeding, but if I space them out by only 2 hours, instead of 2 1/2 or 3, he’s not hungry yet. So, I fed him at 6:30 and then at 9:00 but now its 10 and he’s acting hungry again. But, that would make sense because that’s when he normally eats. Although, its more out of habit than actual hunger. Whatever… as long as he sleeps at 10:30, I don’t care!
So, yesterday he slept through church and lunch, like the great baby he is. I have 3 different days during the week that I have plans in the morning. Sundays I go to church, Tuesdays I go to Bible Study, and Fridays I go to MOPS. But I am trying to adjust his schedule around just church, with no concern for the other two. Perhaps its because the other 2 are women’s groups and I can feed him in the group and I can’t do that during church. My friend, Anna, was so impressed that I would work that hard to be able to arrange his schedule around just going to church on Sunday, but especially with Derick gone, it is such a lifeline for me. I crave the fellowship every week! I can’t wait to get there and get Brody in bed for a nap so that I can spend time in Worship.
I have also been really looking forward to the Women’s Bible Study at church. More so, since Derick left. I think to have a structured time in God’s Word everyday, and to have time with adult women in my church. They are women that I know are praying for me and really care about me and my kids. We are doing the new Beth Moore study called Esther. The last one I did was called Believing God. It really openned my eyes to how much I just believe IN God rather than BELIEVING God and taking Him at his word… believing that he will actually do what he says. I had gotten really lazy about that. Now that I have been through the study, God is really testing my faith by all of the things going on in my life right now. With my mother-in-law being sick and Derick being gone, a new baby, all of the financial stress that we have had. I feel like God is saying, “Ok, now you know you need to trust me… Are you going to put into practice what you have learned?” I want to have faith that God can do anything, but sometimes my faith is weak. I know that God can do anything, and I know that I just need to ask and believe, and I can do anything through the Power of God! If I am so sure of that, why is it so hard to put it into practice. My drama teacher used to say, practice doesn’t make perfect… practice makes permanent. If I start putting my faith into practice will it get easier? I hope so. I want it to be just a part of who I am, a part of my everyday life. I don’t want to be able to separate it from the rest of my life. I admire the people that when you ask them how they are doing, their answer is automatically about what God is currently doing in their life.
God, make me like that. Don’t just be part of me, but let me be part of you. So that you are visible in everything that I do, in the very essence of who I am! Thank you! In Jesus name, Amen.